Today I am sad.
There’s no reason for me to be sad.
I have the day off, and no obligations.
For once, it’s not raining here.
I have books, yarn, cake and friends.
But it’s not the present that makes me sad. I’m crying about the past. For all those years when I was too afraid to let myself grieve and cry.
Perhaps it’s not the passing of time that smooths those jagged edges of loss, but the salt water flowing. And maybe, after all, it’s worth feeling the pain, because when you hurt you know you are alive.
Today, I am sad. Sea green grief.